somthing

i have changed a bit....
i have lost a few things....
i have gained more....
i have burnt bridges...
i have bilt bridges....
i have fucked alot up....
i have gotten somthing i asked for.....
i have goten some things i never thought i would.....
i have changed...
for the better....
life has closed a few doors for me
but opend so many more.....
my scars may never heal.....but maby they will dissapear....
maby they will be filled with somthing else...
some one better

somthing thats kindda always on me mind,......
where i fit in life......
whre im suposed to be....
i think the thing that kindda gets me is....
i want to spend every moment with her....
yet a large chunk of me wants to be in a combat zone....
its finding the inbetwine.....
i kinddfeal like the bomb guy in the hurt locker....
at the end.....
i know where im going ish...
i know what im doing....
its well
after.....that kindda gets me

somthing to write.....
anything worth wile is never easy....
lotta things on the mind latly....
past
present
whats next......
what do i do.....
i know what i want to....
i know what i have to......
i might have to start geting things around for my leave....
dam
4 years.......
this year is gunna go by so fast then im gone.....
but least im the shit....
marines.....
yet i know she will still worry about me....
just like i wory about her.....
its funny...
2 people just fine with being alone.... end up together......
my girl....shes amazing.....
we see our selves so wrong...but the way we see each other.....this is my blog....
my mind....
i might go back into my note book and put up some post...i will try to put more new stuff up....
my past is still on my mind alot.....and its almost still in my face....and i will havde to deal with it for anougher year......
easy...
just do what i have to do inclass....get by and be a marine....get my collage....maby stay in reitre by 40......do w.e i want.....
its the inbetwine now....
thats what gets me......
from now till june 6th.....less than a year to get physicaly redy an mentaly.....
and to do a few other things i want to......
need to talk to pastor......
well thats it for now.....

billy jean was not my girl

its kindda funny....how i see things.....
its kindda funny how im starting to peace things to gether....
its kindda funny how the cards fall.....
or are they pushed?
things are falling into place almost so perfectly....
its just clicking now.....
yet...still hard...but better.......



hey kate......
if i die.....in a combat zone....
you get my notebook

minor details thats what i watch for....
its like
well
everthing is the same
yet somthing is diffrent
the worst part is when it happins and you dont relize it till like a couple days later then its like fuck....i knew that...
its just
odd
and somtimes unbearable.
but i have to for it is a fraction of me