story

So I started writing again...may get my sorty up by the end of mos school if your all lucky.

run untill i drop and hope i cant get back up and freaze to death

The slow cock of the rifle. Got to love the simplicity of the rifle bolt. Slow but simple. Never jams. Always works. Old but new. The dark no shine finish of the rifle. The crosshairs on the scope perfect. The slow sound of the rifle cock. How things have changed so much. Death. Never knowing. Just dying.

writing once again...fuck

The cold snow falling once more aain on my face. Standing here right where I started. The cold snow. My body numb once aain. So cold I can no longer feal. So numb I no longer feal the frozen pains. So cold I never feal the blade any more. So cold. Just take a swim in the frozen lake to ease my pains. Or lack of pain. The frozen water just sucked all the air out of my lungs. I dont gasp for air. I know If i do I will most certenly drown. I cant feal the way I used to. My delema. Do I let the cold water kill me? Or do I let the pain of the cool water bring me back to life? Just a quiclk dip in the water then Im out. Yet I find myself wanting to stay here. Just freaze and sink to the bottom. Stop holding it in let it go. The air from my lungs is gone. The wanter quicly fill the empty space. I start to sink. Falling. The sensation of the air passing my by. Falling faster and faster though the air. The ground is starting to aprouch me. The cold white snow. I stoped trusing myself and I let myself win. The end has come for me once again. The snow is no longer white. Just red once again.

some people just dont get the words leave me the fuck alone....

All of us siting around the nice warm fire. Warmth for once. Yet we all know we payed dearly for it. Just a small conffert. So twiggy decided to start up a conversation. "why dont we all go around the cercle and say what we whant most? i will start....to go home." They when around the circle and it was eaither to go home or see the girl or wife. Then it go to me....well i wanted to go home and i wanted to see my wife but then again i knew thats not what i wanted most. I knew what i wanted so i said. "I whant things to be right so I wouldnt have to do all the things I do." A deep silence fell over. twiggy "you know thats right and all but why did you decided to become a marine?" All of us " To blow shit up and get paid." Its kindda funny how evan the farthest people can come together though the hardest things. War is nothing when all your fighting for is the man next to you and to go home. Thats all we fight for. Well thats all we fight for now. Evan though home really is home anymore. Home to us is where ever we decide to sleep tonight. We know this wont last long. Its just a short break again. We will probly move in the morning on the city. Gah I hate citys. Yet at the same time I know somthing is not right. just somthing. I better get up early and clean my rifle. Tomaorw will be a long day. " for all the ones that will not see the sunset tomaorw we thank you. goodnight devil dogs."

last chapter

And so I did.
He said write and so I did.
I wrote the last cronicals.
He said you shall be last and you shall recourd the end.
And so i was last.
But why?
Why this burden on me?
beacuse some one had to do it.
so I wrote the last chapter.
and finished it with a simple
the end.

#

so i have decided to change my playlist on here so....heres some new numbers



16
19
23
40
46
60
67
69
73
86
87
88
97
98
122

the snow falls freely.

The snow falls.

The cold snow.

The baren woods.

Just the cold ground and the dorment trees.

Just one more place to be on this long trip.

Ha least thats what im calling it now.

the soft crunch of snow still creaps nthought the woods.
the cold wind against my face.
The numbness.
That cold fealing wheres its so cold you dont feel anything.
Continue i must.
Down this path.
Down to the edge of the woods.
Though the villa that lies beyond that.
Across the county.
Back to my home.
Why did I decided to make things right?
Why did i decided to fight for this?
Fuck it Im going home.
Back to her and my life.
Back to myy warm bed.
Hot showers.
Hot food.
Boring job.
But then again, if I never came here.
All would be lost.
I would rest but tyrany never seams to sleep.

its not how i lace up my boots its the fact that i lace up my boots.
the time will come soon.
when tirany will fall.
a new nation will be born.
well
reborn.
good night.
I will watch ovr you as you sleep.
for tonight i clean my rifle.

i dont know what to write but i know i sould write somthing.
i have been called to do somthing....
god exsistes end of statment.
Yet some things still scare me.
yet they are diffrent now.
and somtimes i just dont know what to do.
for once i dont know.

In the silence of the darkness on the last day of the earth. They spoke. All as one. In perfect harmoney.


* decided to write the last thing first in my book.*

ps I love you.

you have some good music

4
6
15
17
24
26 * the begining* i think home
35
72 *ben on the list for a long time* thank you
84
138
141
144- 146
155 always loved that song
168

Falling.
Holding the earth togeather on my back.
Geting crushed under the weight.
Finding the the pain of berdens.
Let it go.
Be free from it.
Breathing with the weight off.
finaly.
Im free

It is never the past or the future that defines us.
It is only now.
Some people choose.
Some people are forced.
It dosnt matter wheather you lived a horible life or you lived a great life.
The only thing that matters is what you leave behind.
The world will go one.
They will speek for you.
People will cry.
People will try to hid the feelings of loss.
People will be glad.
People will.
So only take tomaorw as your last day.
For you only live today.

-deep taught.
its the chaos that surrounds an idea

anyways
its not how much you want it its how much your willing to work for it.
How much your willing to give up.

I never want to be reconized for the things i do.
Just remember me.
That is enough.

Folow your dreams.
Yet remember you are not alone.
Sometimes its not about your dreams.
Somtimes some one has better dreams.
I may not folow my dreams, but I still folow my path.
My path of faith, hardship, and will.
Yet I have found some one worth it.
Some one worth the fight.
Someone worth coming home to.
home.....
somthing that still needs work on.

Alot has been on my mind.
mostly whats gunna hapin this year school wise
and the rest of my life wise.
still figuring out how im suposed to put the peaces to me together.
yet some how i feel im still locking them away.
I find myself diggin in the past every so so.
still thinking about the marines mostly
so i have 2 days of freedom.
then im off.
for an adventure.
least i wont ever be bord

screaming.
fighting.
living.
dying.
breathing.
slipping.
falling.
striving.
finding what i always wanted.
Her.
She is worth everything.
THats all i have to say